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Friday, May 31, 2013

Multi-Dimensional Autistic

This is going to be one of those weird, "Talk about myself" blogs, so pardon my awkwardness. I'm not my favorite subject, though time was I couldn't get enough of, "Me, me, me!" It's a rather dull way to live, and I can't recommend it. You're far more interesting to me,  but for the purpose of showing expansion.....(Deep Breath)
   My being is made of various interests, and I'm different things to different people. At work, I'm a moderator for an art forum, I'm an oil portrait artist, I'm a long-practiced and ever-learning spiritualist who meditates daily for over 24 years now. I'm a blogger on various subjects, I can be right or correct, and let it go without having to prove a thing. I can be misunderstood, and be o.k. with it. I can be wrong, and I can be unsure. I'm teachable even when I'm sure of something, as I'd consider myself a fool to assume I know the final answer on anything. 
   In my family, I'm Mom and a grandmother, a daughter, an aunt and a sister.  I'm someone who's lost over 100 lbs and comes up with ideas and recipes to encourage others. I'm a woman, a Leo who's interested in Astrology, I'm a videographer with a youtube page, I'm a recovering drug addict and alcoholic of over 15 1/2 years clean and sober. I'm straight. I guess I was born that way. I have a sense of humor. I've studied as many belief systems as I've  found, and found a bit of beauty in each of them. Autism is pervasive through all of these things, but so is being a Mom or an Artist or a Leo. For that reason and others I think it odd that people would want to friend me outside of  any of the private groups I belong to. At the very least, I attempt to let others know they will find much more than what I share in any particular private group.
   For instance, I'm on a Low Carb forum, and wouldn't it be a hoot if one of them friended me thinking my entire Facebook existence was going to be about how to cook? Won't they be surprised when I talk about using coconut oil as a hair treatment, proper lighting for videos, what it's like to have Saturn in my 7th House (It rocks by the way.), how to achieve believable perspective in art, or being Autistic? I'm a very well rounded person. My primary "Special Interest" is Painting, but there is so very much to me that I can't possibly touch on here. Being Autistic is how I perceive (very thoroughly). It's who I am, but not the total of who I am. (Attempt to "cure" any of these things, and I'd be annoyed, by the way.) If you don't want to bore a person, get interested in who they are, rather than trying to change them, and that applies to everyone.

    Being Autistic is who I am. I cannot be separated from being Autistic, nor could I be separated from being an Artist or a woman. These things simply are. At the very level of my beingness I am a woman. It's not about activity, nor is being an Artist. It's how I think, perceive and am. So is being Autistic. Take any of these things away, and I would not be me.
     I'm also a blonde with spectacular "Dumb  Blonde" moments (You could dye my hair, and that will not change who I am.), and a Savant who loves chocolate and can't stand sweet potatoes. I could try to stop memorizing things that I see or hear (That doesn't work.), and practice harder at my slower processing side, but I will still be Savant. Being an Artist gets me attributed certain traits (Flake) as does being Autistic (Intelligent and detached), as does being Blonde (Dumb), a Leo (Sensual) or a Mom (Loving/practical). None of these alone total who I am, and many are subject to accuracy checks. Perhaps surprising or not, I'm not a, "Gamer Girl." (Common thought of Autistic females) I'm 47, and those things weren't invented when I was little. I'm also a cancer survivor, and with that comes certain traits that are not common to Autism, but common to cancer survivors. (I'm perhaps more health-conscious and aware of the precious minutes of life to be had/grateful) My Rahu (South Node of the Moon that amplifies whatever it comes in contact with) conjuncts my Moon is in Gemini for, "Heaven's" sake!(Boom-chicka-wah-wah! x10)

    One would be hard-pressed to pick a single trait of mine and attribute it to any particular facet of my personality to the exclusion of all others. I like rubber bands (Autistic texture fixation), but they are infinitely useful in closing things like chip bags (Mom), They can be put on a block randomly for making ink prints (Artist), I can twist one into a mobius while meditating on the Eternity Symbol (Spiritualist), and I just may sling one at you for a laugh (Playful Leo). Follow?
   All of these things get touched on in my life, my blogs, my videos and my page. Without each, I would not be who I am. Some are roles, some are inborn, and all are deeply ingrained and freely expressed. I've had friends from various private groups come to my page and nearly dominate it with (for instance) alcohol recovery. Truthfully there are similarities between carbohydrate addiction and that. There are also similarities between say, being for instance a keep to oneself Scorpio or a pragmatic Virgo and being Autistic, but they attempt to peg me, and quickly I slip through their fingers. It's not intentional. I'm just not two dimensional, and that can make people uncomfortable, not excluding ourselves.  We are going to judged by any number of our traits. All the more reason not to judge or peg ourselves. Explore, explore, explore.Who are you?

  I write this more for those new to diagnosis of Autism more than anyone. Though Autism may explain much of our characteristics, no role or  label in life can define a person totally. It can afford camaraderie and the sharing of likenesses with others, and that is an invaluable experience for so many who've felt totally alone, but for myself, this is a stepping stone to self discovery and world discovery. For myself it is part of the journey of life rather than the final answer. It's lead to more questions, more discovery and even more fun. 
  Ever more to learn, 
tina jones

Monday, May 20, 2013

Low Carb: Bacon Maple Monkey Bread

Low Carb Bacon Maple Monkey Bread

Yes, I know...
*THAT..... is some sexy!*

First:  Nods to "Cleochatra/ Jamie Van Eaton. Her Blog with great recipes including her Oopsie Roll Revolution Roll recipe:

Recipe: Preheat oven to 350 F
            Cook Bacon, Crumble and set aside.
             Use 1 tsp bacon fat (or butter) to grease a small Casserole dish or a Bread Pan.
            Line one or two large cookie sheets with Parchment Paper
 Separate 6 large eggs
Add 1/2 tsp Cream of tartar to Whites and beat to stiff peaks.

Beat yellows to with a fork and add:
    2 tsp Cinnamon
    12 tsp Nutmeg
     7-8 drops Stevia
     1 pkt sweetener of your choice.

Fold yellow mix into Beaten Whites 1/3 at a time, folding gently to incorporate. Place in mounds roughly 3-4" diameter on Parchment Paper.
    Bake 30 minutes at 300F.
    When done, cut into 1" Cubes

In a large Mixing Bowl,
        Put remaining 3 Whole Eggs in a bowl.
        Add and Mix in:
           2 tsp Cinnamon
          1/2 tsp Nutmeg
           7-8 Drops Stevia
           1 pkt of sweetener of your choice

Toss Cubed Rolls and 1/2 of Crumbled Bacon to coat in the wet egg mix. Press into greased casserole dish. Top with remaining Bacon. Bake at 300F for 45 minutes.
      Top with Sugar Free Maple syrup and Butter.
  Serves 4 at 4.1 Carbs per serving.

  Carbohydrate Breakdown for Total ingredients in recipe as follows:

9  Large eggs divided                     5.4
1/4th teaspoon Cream of Tartar-    0
4 teaspoon Cinnamon divided-       4
1teaspoon Nutmeg divided-           1
6 strips Thick Cut Bacon -             0
2 pks sweetener divided-               2
Stevia 14-16 drops divided            0
Sugar Free Maple Syrup-               0
Butter-                                           0
total-                                              12.4
Serves 4 at-                                    4.1 Carbs each

      *This recipe is only moderately sweet, before adding Sugar Free Maple Syrup at the end. I tried it with double the sweetener, and it was too sweet for my taste, but may be better to others. It may be good with varying amounts as per your taste.
     *Other options like using more sweetener packets or topping with cream cheese will add carbs, so use as per your needs.
    *This makes 4 very hearty servings, and could easily be split into 8 servings for a light breakfast.
     *Can be microwaved four up to 30 seconds, for a single of the 4 serving size.

Watch my instructional video here below or Larger Here!!!
(and if you like, please subscribe to my Youtube Channel!
Did I tell you you're beautiful when you're eating bacon today? ;)

Monday, May 13, 2013

B.Y.O.C.B: Be Your Own Cock Block and Other Talents That I Have!

How To Be Your Own Cock Block on Facebook (or other Social Media): 

 ***Simply re-post this blog as your own notice.***

                         You're welcome! :)             

General Notice for Cleanup: Anyone approaching me for romantic, sexual, political, moral, immoral, poor-me, nobody understands me, if they just did it my way, "Do you ever paint nekked?" "I have a camera/pencil/one eye/bifocals/a seeing eye dog/cat/gerbil, so will you pose nekked?", or religious (it's all the same thing to me) reasons will be virtually gutted and fed their own entrails especially if they are militant vegetarians/potheads/Baptists/hula-hoop-competitors/those with "open or complicated" marriages/relationships who are baffled that I'm not "givin' it up,"  or anyone who read an article online and therefore thinks it must be true, anyone trying to "cure" autism, athlete's foot, cancer, bad breath, wars, or jock itch with cannabis, green beans or carrots, or anyone promoting any cause having to do with anyone named Trump or McCarthy (Same comb-over/different shoes) with "special insights" that are exactly what the next one says. Lack of originality will get you virtually slapped, not by me personally, but by any number of unfortunately homely cousins who don't wash their hands, pick their noses, and who will think, "You sure have a purdy mouth, boy!"

"Whuh?! Why is she here then?"
 I am glad you asked!
It's crazy, I know, but I'm here for work and family purposes. Imagine my gall!
You see, I regularly promote a forum that I moderate at and I promote youtube videos that I make money off of. Insanely hoity! I know. 
  I'm also here to have regular contact with my children, and several friends. Mostly, I post silly, funny, uplifting, thoughtful posts, and I try to include inspirational items as I find them.
 To the dismay, angst or shock of some, none of that means I'm trying to get laid. I know! Who would have "thunk it?" Nonetheless, that is the ugly truth of it.

  Thanks for reading! Later days and better lays for you and others who may be suffering, because of people like me who are simply being unreasonable/hard to get/not a chance in hell giving/taken to vows of celebacy/getting "it" in other places/ya can't touch this/ Yes! But not with you!/Not interested/Had it removed/or any number of reasons we're not here for anything but work or family/friendships.
  Hugs and kisses! <3 xoxoxo
P.S. If all else fails or if they bore, simply click the Block Button!

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Lion Heart in Midnight Flame

Tired in a dark forest of life, he found me, and found something of hope. I had little left, but for him I would. I was going, but I stayed long past life's rent was due. We danced round night fires and such was something of heaven. He bid me, "Come! Play in the sun!" and I can't. I stay cloaked by wood's edge while he goes and waves to me. And I have something of joy to see him do the things I cannot. And I watch him, the sun in me, play in the two o'clock sky as if it were easy.
   Sometimes, though I try to stay grateful, I come to self pity. I fall to envy those who can enjoy the sun. I hear them speak of the beauty of day break, and play of summer, but I can't. My skin does not like the sun. The dark side of the Lion Heart is the Destroyer. The giver of life in Spring is the taker in August, and the Wheel spins peaceful complete. What was once play is poison, though my bones at times long for it's warmth. I've had to see the beauty of night, because of because of this. I look at photos streaming rays, and I remember fondly, but now the Moon is my Sun. closed blinds, because the older I grow, the more sensitive my eyes to light, but I remember greens and light so bright it washed even reds from sight.
   I have candle beside me, a small bit of sun. We're one. I take to my brushes to create light, and maybe the sun was in me all a long. Maybe I burn enough within, and that's why the night is no longer dark, but full of color and often warm. I am not like all, but I am like many who, brush in hand see through our fingers and feel the sun in people, stars in eyes, light from a breath.
   We ecstatically wretched, the vampiric servants, the portraitists, steal or borrow only bits of souls, touches of light, when too much is too hot, and issue eternity through the life's blood of tearful brushstrokes. Free-falling, we descend into wells of such sweet agony, that we would do it again and again, It's all we have, or all I do, and in our own little by death, by little, each time more gone than the time before, we see you breathe, and for a moment together we breathe, and though I may go one day, taking a name with me that is not who I was, simply drawn on your shoulders, I joy in knowing you will live forever in light.
Do not remember me. Leave me the rose amber glow of shadows. Remember you were loved, and give it away as though your life depended on it.
 It does.
  As for Death, Enough foreplay. Either come and get me, or the get out of my way. ...
Waiting a moment,
My candle still burns. I thought as much.
Dearest Companion, I'll run to you when I'm ready. Step aside, or make yourself useful.
Brushes need washing, there are yet more dances in the night, and I have painting to do.

tina jones