Unapologetically Ourselves

Years ago, I attended an open drawing studio. 

I brought my sketch pad, some pencils and a kneaded eraser. I am oddly, approachable, or moreso than I'm usually comfortable with. I was more concerned this time about the comfort of the middleaged woman sitting in a white robe waiting for time to start drawing. I'm not good at chit-chat, but I seem to be able to leave my insecurity aside when I believe someone needs me to be more. I asked how long she'd modelled, and she happily engaged answering that and where she'd worked and soon it was announced drawing would begin with some short sketches. 

  The room was about 12x12 foot holding maybe ten people around a 4x6 foot platform, so there isn't much room to move to get a better perspective. I learned to work with whatever I had, and drew the backs of chairs or the bottoms of feet more than once. 
  The model did a very unexpected thing. Upon hearing we'd start, she turned toward me smiled, dropped her robe and lifted her joyous face and arms into the air. I scored a few mediocre sketches that night, but far beyond nudity, I won the right to shine, because she believed it was o.k. for her to do the same.

Don't be less than you. You cannot make yourself small enough that no one will ever envy you or try to cut you down to make themselves feel better in the absence of taking any action to believe in themselves. That job is theirs, and you can't save them their work. Yours job is to live. 
Don't be less of you.

Don't be less beautiful, intelligent, sexy or hard-earned strong. 
Don't be less funny, less caring or less loving. 
Don't be less playful, helpful, silly or ingenuitive. 
Don't be less talkative or less contemplative or less of a listener. 
Don't hold back when you dance, heal others, soap-box or make love.
Don't downplay  you in order to fit in or please anyone.
Don't restrict your paintings, your unborn novels, your discoveries, and the time you spend gazing at the surface of water or blowing bubbles. 
Don't downplay the work you've done, or how much blood you've spilled for something that looks like mere talent now.
Don't be less of you, neither cover nor dim your shine. Someone needs your light, and it may be that someone is ...you.


It's o.k. to try being true to yourself, and fall flat on your face.
It's o.k. to be scared.
It's o.k. to feel like you're not enough and to take up space on the planet anyway.
 It's o.k. to glow, then hide, and it's o.k. burst with light.

 Live your fullness, your ideas, your dreams. Be as glorious as you are, because there's also someone watching who may be even more afraid. Someone watches who may not know their own worth. Step into your sacred opportunity to be as amazing as you are for you, but also do it because someone needs to see you being happy in order to believe it's o.k. for them to be happy too.

tinajonesart

72 Questions I've Been Asked (Humor and Other)

I'm amazed by the questions I get asked.
Some interesting inquiries and comments have come up privately, and sometimes they come up publicly. Often these come up in everyday talk of art, so they may be useful to others.
   Some are about Art. Some are about Autism/Aspergers, and some are about at the end of my limits!  It seems more time conserving to write the answers here, rather than answer individually.

Quickly, this should cover most of them:

1.   How big are they? Think of your mother, your aunt and your grandmother, put them all together along with any vision you may have, subtract the b.s., and you'll be there.
2.   How long are your legs? They keep my butt from dragging the ground.
3.   You have no ass! You have no hobbies, obviously. Look up any picture of "The Three Graces," and get over it.
4.     How do you grow your fingernails? I don't gnaw them off. I also eat a good amount of protein, and can't stand snags. Those are filed as soon as possible. They don't get a chance to catch on anything and break. I'm sure genetics are involved as well.
5.    How do you get away with charging $900. for an oil portrait? When you charge $100, people tell you what to paint. When you charge $900, they're just glad you're painting. I average about 3 commissoins a year for several years now.
6.    Why aren't you married? I tried three times. It's not one of my talents.
7.    Where were you educated/who taught you to paint?  I have no formal education, and I didn't take lay classes. I have a neurological disorder (Asperger's Syndrome) that cripples me when around many people, and it also sets me in the 98th percentile intellectually when it comes to memorizational skills. (Yes it was tested.) I was born memorizing faces. Practice for decades followed by reading some books rather than chewing the backs off of them, led me to understanding and learning things like how to mix mediums. I was not born knowing what turpentine was. I also asked a lot of questions of other artists. Some of them will even tell you the truth.
8.    How do you memorize faces when people with Autism have face blindness/forget faces? Many times I know a face, but have no idea who they are. I forget people, but I rarely forget a wrinkle, a freckle or the hair growth pattern of their eyebrows. Names, unfortunately don't stick.
9.    Why don't you know about html, nuclear physics, and why can't you memorize the phone book like Rain Man? I have no interest in phone books. I don't like to talk on the phone, and I've no interest in being anyone's side show act. Physics of any kind, however does interest me, though I know little about it.
10.   What kind of shampoo do you use? I switch between different kinds and brands, but I do have a liking for green bottles. No idea why... I don't shampoo more than once every few days unless I've done sweaty work, and I don't use a lot of gooey products in my hair.
11.    Do you work out? Do I look like someone who likes to sweat?!
12.   I still don't get it? How in the world is someone born knowing how to draw or paint?! Think of it this way. Let's say you were born somehow knowing on some level about your sexuality. Small examples appeared as soon as you were able to express and demonstrate liking for certain toys or people. Later, you instinctively knew  you were supposed to do something with this inborn ability. Eventually, you figured it out, and with dedicated practice even at times obsession, you got good at it. Now, the rest of the world had to go to college for six years to figure out what goes where and why or to even begin to play with toys and like minded people, but you just had it in you from birth. By golly, You're a natural! That is how I know how to paint.
13.   Sexuality? You're a sex maniac like all artists! Ok let me try again. Let's say your grandmother was born with a flair for food flavors. She didn't know the names, but she knew what tastes went well together. Through passion and desire, she tried an idea or two, and at the age of five made one hell of a good cake. It looked like a miracle to everyone around. Dedicated, even obsesively at times, she practiced and became an excellent cook. Now, I was not born knowing any of this. I only ate one flavor at a time. I can, however follow your grandmother's recipe and make a pretty good cake. She was born with it, I had to learn it. She knows cooking like I know painting.
14.    Do you think measles vaccines cause Autism? I don't know. I never had them. Scarey, huh? grins I had both Rubella and Rubiola in the first three weeks of my life, before the vaccines were scheduled, so there was no need for them. Can they cause Autism? I don't know. Did they cause mine? Obviously not.
15.    Why don't you know everything about painting if you were born with it? I've not needed or been exposed to everything. I'm only 46, and I'm still learning. When I need something, I learn it, just like you do. I just learn better on my own than from books or others. It's neurological.
16.     If you're so smart, then why can't you fix my car? I don't know anything about cars.
17.    What were your favorite subjects in high school: Math of any kind and Science. Both break down the small parts of things, and are tidy precise works. I like that, and the same applies to my way of doing art.
18.     Why don't you eat sugar and grains? When I did, I got horrendously fat. When I quit, my appetite went down, and I lost the extra pounds.
19.    But the FDA Food Pyramid says.....: They also approve drugs that get class action law suits for dammages roughly three years after each drug is approved. My body says, "Don't eat it."
20.    What the hell is that hum in your voice?: It's stim. Many people with Autism have them. That hum is a vocal stim.  I also flick my fingers against the palm of my hand, hand flap if very excited, rock to and fro, and have a go at tongue chewing when it hits me. Try it. It may calm you down too.
21.     Did you ever try to stop stimming? Yes, I was punished for it as a child. For example, I used to thump my head on the floor gently and rhymically to calm myself. I was told by the person who "helped" me with that, "I just took the back of your head and slammed your face into the floor like a basket ball." They are quite proud of their achievement, and laugh about it. I don't find it funny, I find it abusive. As a teen and young adult, I tried to hide the stims and tone them down, but I was never totally successful. Aging, life experience and resetting my priorities, helped me let go of what other's thought, relax and just be myself. If stimming bothers them, they have a problem, and I can't help them with that. It works better to be true to myself.
22.     Can you cook? Only if I'm hungry, and even then it's not pretty.
23.    Are all artist really sex fiends? You do paint naked people.: No, but many non artists have a very rich fantasy life that extends beyond the bounds of logic. It is exceeding difficult to do anything else while painting, let alone consider having sex. Paint is a lot of hard work, inborn or not. It takes focus, and at the very least the other person would be cheated of my attention. I'm not someone who can read a book during sex either, by the way. I tend to get involved. Also, reading takes a lot of focus. I'm very slow at it.
24.    But you look at a naked person for hours and don't get turned on? I know your musculature and your bones. I also know the inner workings of your kidneys. That doesn't turn me on either.  What I'm basically looking at is your particular dispersion of fat. That will determine how light plays differently on you than the next nude.
25.    I can't draw/paint, because I wasn't born with talent like you: More than anything, I was born with desire. If you have that, anything is possible. I also practice a lot. If you do that, you'll get better. Further, I've seen many from simple Bob Ross type painting through portraiture without them knowing how I "learned" it. Talent or in my case a neurological bend doesn't mean anything without hard work.
26.    But I'll never paint like you! No, and I'll never paint like you. The world needs all of us, and all of our art. Don't short change it, by not doing your very important part. And don't shortchange me. I may learn something from you.
27.    Would you marry me? :Would you like to be slapped? What have I done to you?
28.     Do you ever donate paintings? Yes, I do two charity works a year, but that is my limit, and I'm backed up until next year. I choose who I do them for based on how helpful I think they'll be.
29.     So you're a self taught artist: No, again. It's built in. Are you a self taught breather? You knew it, not intellectually, but instinctually. Later, you may have learned controlled breathing exercises, later I learned how to mix mediums, colors and what not.
30.     Will you meet me at..? Not a chance in hell or earth.
31.     Why don't you charge for telling people how to paint? I wasn't charged for it. I'm sure given time, you could do it on your own, and I get joy from helping and seeing others get it. You don't need me to learn, I'm just here to remind you of that. The online stuff is free. What I have charged for is when people want to meet me to paint. The lessons are free, me being around people costs.
32.   You can paint anything! No. I have trouble with multi-layered flowers. It's more an annoyance than a disability, especially if the flowers are pink. The color irritates me.
33.    Are you into bondage? If you cannot sit still and pose while I paint you without the use of ropes, then I simply will not paint you.
34.    Why aren't you in all of the competitions?: How does competition add to my desire to help others learn how to paint? I get as much joy if not more from seeing them succeed. Competing against them is counterproductive to my desire. I'd rather challenge myself, my last painting, than worry about outdoing someone else. I find it a waste of time. That said, I do enter one competition a year just to see if I can outdo myself. So far, they've not let me in, so no one is in any danger. grins.
35.   Why won't you meet me? It's not personal. I just don't like you.
36.  But I don't have any money to paint: Use food coloring or coffee, and a shoe string on a piece of news paper. Show me your results, and together, we'll make it better.
37.    How did you learn to paint skin?: That one was harder. I had the misfortune of having bruises regularly as a child, and I had access to some old makeup. The 70's had a lot of different colors. I used them on my own skin to try to cover marks. I found that yellow for instance will cover a purple bruise, green eye shadow would tone down a red mark, etc. I got pretty good at it. The same works on a canvas. If the subject is too yellow, add purple, too red, add green, etc.
38.   Oh sorry: Stuff happens. I learned, moving on.
39.    Aren't you angry about this? I was for years, but anger is exhausting. They did the best they could. It was a crappy job. To remain angry is to remain enslaved. I'm free, safe, I've let go, I wish them well, I can't help them, and I'm content. Blame is a useless endeavor, and a good way to keep from being responsible for one's own choices. I'm a big girl now. I choose happiness.
40.    I think you're a Light Seeker, Angel, an Indigo Child,  my Soul Mate! Sucking up about meeting is not going to make it happen. I think you're nuts, and suggest getting help, but not from me.
41.    But don't you want recognition?! For what?
42.     For teaching people how to paint? I haven't taught them anything. I show some techniques. The rest is up to them. I just remind them that they can do it. They always could. Something about life makes people forget, I think.
43.    Fine! If you're an artist who's not a sex maniac, then how many people have you slept with?! Fewer than I've had sex with.
44.    So I've read people like you have no empathy, are you mean? No, infact I feel so deeply that it incapacitates me at times. Other times, the way I feel empathy and act on it, is very useful. Picture a fight between two very rough boys. One is getting hurt bad. Normal empathy is displayed in a group watching. Some empathize with the winner, yelling to cheer him on, and others empathize with eachother at the horror by holding onto eachother in fear and perhaps crying. I do not have these kinds of empathy. What I feel is for the person being hurt. I do not join the crowd. My empathetic action is to run straight in and stop the fight. This makes me the odd one out to the group, therefore they do not see my empathy, but it is of little matter, if I stopped the harm.
45.   So, do you think normal people are stupid by the way they empathize? No, I think different ways of feeling and reaction are useful in different situations. I wouldn't be of much use at a group comiserating over the loss of a hair product, and that need in society is met by those who can empathize with it. I just put my hair in a bun, but many are debilitated by what others think. They need the empathy of those who can relate better than I. People like this are much better at creating bonds than I am, and it's an inherent to them matter of survival, so I'm not trivializing by mentioning hair products. It's just an example I've seen.
46.    Don't you care what others think about you? Ofcourse I do, but not much. I care more what I think.
47.    Why aren't you medicated for your symptoms of Autism like anxiety? Along with Autism, I am also a recovering alcoholic/drug addict. Medications act in a way that is unpredictable in all of these. Basically, if the insert says, "Rare side effects" you might as well put my name beside them. In some of us, they do more harm than good. In others, they are life savers.
48.    Why won't you come enter our show? If I did that, I fear, and have been even warned, press might be involved, and I do not want to choke anyone on camera! I do not like crowds or spotlights. Best to let paintings enjoy lights. I do not find myself nearly as fascinating as your paintings. Further, I am not a press opportunity. I am a person.
49.    Do you paint naked? Do you do your dishes naked? Wait, I don't want to know. Pigments in paint that are toxic like Cadmiums, Titanium and Cobalts among others can be absorbed through the skin. It's wise to cover oneself. Further, don't eat while painting.
50.   Why do you do glazing? Your paint is not thick enough! Thick paint was invented by the Impressionists. I'm not that impressed with it. Oh it's fine and even beautiful, but it doesn't offer the glow of glazing that I want. It's just a personal preferrence.
51.    What kind of music do you listen to when painting? I often paint in silence, but I do love Andrea Bocelli, and if I'm painting for sheer silliness, I'll listen to Pop music.
52.    Why the loose black and white paintings when I've seen your realistic oil portraits? When I had cancer, I was very limited to how much time I could sit up. Setting up with two colors, a medium and a canvas was quicker than the range of oils I needed, and Acrylics meant I could get a lot done in the short time I had. I set a goal of fifty, aware that I might not live that long. I've surpassed the goal by several. I've lost count. Now, they are just fun for me.
53.    So...the cancer. Are you ok now? Yes, thankyou. I'm cancer free.
54.    Can you still have children? I'm a grandmother! Back off junior!
55.     How do you make time for painting? How do you make time for hugging, dancing, yard work, cooking. My time is spent on what I love, just like yours is. 
56.   Will you paint my deceased Grandmother? No. I no longer paint dead people. It's hard to get them to pose (humor). Seriously, I found that the emotional reactions of those I painted for were too overwhelming for me.
57.    Do you paint from photos? Yes. I take as many as 20 photos, and choose what ones work best. Something will show in one that does not in another. I also often do sketching from life along with the photos. Photography can be blurred, enhanced or otherwise enough off that I need life to see what I'm doing. The photos are there for reference, not for copying.
58.    Do you ever use a projector? I have, but it's been years. Personally, I love sketching. It's my first love, and I enjoy practicing it. Not everyone does. I don't see a thing wrong with projectors, grids or what have you. They can certainly expediate the process, but why get something over with that you enjoy? Also, there will come a time in each painting where initial lines are lost, and an artist's ability to draw will save that painting. So, no matter the initial method, I do encourage continued drawing practice.
59.   Are you rich? No, coupon cutting is an art form, and thrift shops love me.
60.    How do you dress as an artist? I just cover it up.
61.    Why are you playing with that wad of clay? It's called a "kneaded eraser." It can be formed to erase either broadly or precisely. It feels good to play with. Get your own!
62.   Do you stand or sit painting? It depends on how high the work is, and if I can reach it. Also, for me, standing aides in looser work, while sitting gets me more precision, and is easier on my back.
63.   Who is your favorite artist? It changes daily. Any beginner that I see trying stands out as magnificent to me.
64.   Why do you paint people? I've not found anything more beautiful or fascinating by spirit or visage.
65.    Can you paint in black and white, color, in oils, acrylics, water color, guache, egg tempera, spit and dirt, lasagne, etc.? If it makes a mark, yes I can paint with it. (so can you)
66.     Where do you get your patience for painting? Again, it's built in, like many people's love for chocolate. Do you need patience to eat a candy bar? Same thing. You're hardwired to love what you love. So am I.
67.    How long does it take you to finish a painting? Until I'm done. Glazing in oils, anywhere from a few weeks to about 6 weeks. Looser acrylics, a day or two. The rest are somewhere in between.
68.    If not marriage, are you interested in being a concubine? I'm perfectly capable of painting anyone with horns and a tail, naming it, "!#*##(#*$##!" and displaying it publicly.
69.    Where do you get your strength to paint? I meditate.
70.     How do you meditate? I paint.
71.     Can I paint you naked? I have no idea. Let me see your portfolio.
72.     Will you let me paint you naked? No.

  
  
tina jones

Art and Your Sofa: Rant to an Anonymous Socialite

Art and Your Sofa

A Guide for Non-artists, Socialites and Other "Poor Misunderstood" People to Art and Artists

Art is never created to match your sofa*

*Sofa, for the purposes of this document shall refer to your sofa, any and all of your belongings from your wall paper to your welcome mat, and from your tie collection to your dentures, from your other art works to your life in general, and from your tastes to your opinions. It was not created to amuse you, to aid in your social activities or for you to understand, incorporate into your being or speak of in any way. Doing so incidentally may result in your coming across as a pseudo-intellectual bore to artists in general, but an ill-informed, pompous prick to those whom you may aim to impress. Art, by the way was not meant to impress or to help you impress.  This is not limited to the list so far stated, and the artist reserves the right to amend at will.  

   With utmost respect to your sofa,* art was created for some reasons that have nothing to do with you. ( No, really. It was.)

    Art was created for the pleasure of the artist, be it to express, to have fun, to indulge in senses or to let off some steam, be it to practice, to hone, to learn, creation is a selfish process, and it is quite likely that the artist did not think of you in the least when it was created. Occasionally, much like masturbation, the artist may think of another person, still the act is entirely self pleasuring.

     What you can do: You may ask the artist questions about the art like where to hang it. Do not ask if you don't want to know. Having received their thoughts, it’s best to lay the conversation to rest, reserving debate for others who know as little as you do. The artist has given their knowledge and opinion. You are in their area of expertise; you are conversing with (albeit, often overworked) alchemists, and not in a place where you stand a chance. Save face. Take the high road, and let it go. You may of course, hang where you like. (Double entendre intended.) While most artists are more than willing to toss pearls before swine, they are not likely to defend their point of view, in effect, doing it twice. Pushing this, will likely result in the phenomenon known as “the artistic temperament.”  You’ll have better luck checking with your mailman, house keeper, pedicurist or pet shampooer for debate. Art by the way, was not created for debate. If we wanted to yak endlessly about it, we wouldn't bother painting it.

      What you need to know about art:

You need to know if you like it and if you don’t. Take your time with that one.

      What you don’t need to know about art:

Everything else. You can study the best of the best of writers, and use large art words, but God created buckshot for just this purpose. Please do not annoy the artist with any gathered information. We know, and while it’s heart warming that you’ve read a book, we could basically care less. We’d rather be making art. Guests, who you’d hope to dazzle with artistic word savvy, would likely rather be eating the main course. You also don't need to know about our "deep inner angst." Most of us don't have any, and I personally am not going to make any up to please you. We don't have time for angst. We're working.

       What artists are: We are people who like to create and do so.

       What artists are not: We are not your pets. We are not to be put on display at social gatherings as a new addition to your collection. We don't need to be "discovered" by you. We already know we're here. We will not dress to match your sofa,* and we are not decorative accessories. Most of us do not enjoy being poked, petted or otherwise molested by strangers, be it in the name of showing our art or for the purpose of raising your social status. That's the stuff of personal adds, not art. However, should you fancy posing, I'll be happy to paint you poised for recognition on and of your sofa*. It'll make your interior decorator go all a-flutter, I'm sure.

       We appreciate you:

 It’s nice that you like art, as many of our galleries are full and we could use the storage space. We appreciate it. We are not, however hanging art at your place in infantile ideas that it will get us anywhere socially or financially. Social and financial issues are for socialites and accountants. Again, we are artists. Hanging our art out of our site is always a risk, and one that is not taken lightly. Hours, months and years have sometimes gone into the making, and we do not relish the idea of uninvited fingering of our creations. As all museums know, acid of the hand will in the long run damage art, besides someone might sneeze on it.

     Why Artists take the risk: There is a good reason that we hang our art in other places.  In all likelihood, we are hanging our art at your place, because we like you. Most of us have no need to be shown, so that argument is mute. One artist (myself), has been creating art for 35 years, painting for 24 years,  is known worldwide and has sold hundreds of works to many more countries than I can presently count. Basically, the favor you present is being done for you.

     Any and all opinions, yeah buts, whys or other noises will be respectfully heard and promptly dismissed, unless I tire, then they’ll be dismissed before hearing, and you’ll be asked to refer to your dog shampooer.

At Your Service,

Tina Jones

(Who at times, "shares the love" while toting a cat of nine tails.)

"Don't Look Back"
16x20
Acrylic on Canvas
(sold with attendant rant which they tell at social gatherings, including their audacity to rename the work. My title, which stands, wasn't provocative enough to make for chit chat, so the painting is also known as *Electric Nude.* Sighs...so the story grows....so I nap.)

The Dark Side of Beauty

The earliest records of painting on cave walls record the kill of hunt. Caravaggio presented his bodiless head on canvas to a pope, and Frieda Kahlo painted herself skewered by a rod through her abdomen depicting the most painful moment of life to her at the time. Then perhaps most gripping was "The Scream" by Edvard Munch.

 Beauty is sometimes in the countrysides, sunsets and billowing impressionistic parasols...

Othertimes it reaches into taboo, those things we'd alternately rather not think about, or we think about them when no one is watching....

"Kneeling Nude (The Prayer)"
11x14
Acrylic on Canvas

Messing With the Masters: Shakespear

"Let me not to the marriage of true minds
admit impediments.Love is not love
"Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove;
O,no!it is an ever fixed mark,
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown,although his hiehgt be taken.
Love's not Time's fool,though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bendingsickle's compass come;
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error,and upon me prov'd.
I never writ,nor no man ever lov'd." William Shakespeare.......
.

Well, Billy.... Bless your heart........

What of love he missed in nailing it down
like a frozen fall or granite gown?
Love doth move! Indeed it grows!
Love is the very flux
banks swell and redux.
Love dances to a moon of tidal pools
Low and high in calls and coos.
No, Shakespear would have no more of love
than what he spotted as named then shov'd
it into captive definition
in doing so blocked accomodation.
"Alteration" is Love and Love Changed
When love is lost, Love is what remains.......Tina Jones.....So There! (hehe)

"Untitled"
11x14
Acrylic on Canvas

"In Love We Live"

I am small, and I know little, but I grow, and I learn. Love has been the most illusive word avoiding definition, and dancing around pidgeon holing. It doesn't seem to like fitting in boxes, and regards placement as an amusing thing to play with. It seems to move of it's own having it's own life and intelligence. Intelligence that giggles at reason no less.
  Still, for today, here is my best description of the playful child.
Love: an inpersonal sense of good will, meaning I want the best for you regardless of what gain or loss that might mean to me. With the word "love," I'm reassuring others freedom to be themselves/pursue their happiness with my support. You cannot earn it, nor can you make my love go away. It simply is.
  Loving you is my gift to me and my joy for who you are. I'm left in awe by you, your dreams, your strengths and your loves. When I watch you fly, I am transformed. Part of me awakens to life, and my heart remembers it's wings. How could I do anything, but love you?
tina jones

"In Love We Live"
8x10"
Oil on Canvas

Censorship and the Artist

 Fine painting you have here! GENIUS, SIR!
   Thank you, I was a little concerned about the light in.....
Well, You're the artist, Sir.
Yes. Do you suppose your gallery would consider...?
 Hmm.What have you titled this work?
 "Nude on Canvas"
 Fine name it is, at that!

 So do you think..?

Well Sir, it's just that some of our clientele are, well...sensitive...
 Uh huh....

And well, Sir..You have genitalia showing in your painting.

  I see.

 If, perhaps you might..somehow..just cover the area?

  With?
 Well, Sir we have an array of decorative paint swatches. Might I suggest, white, or something in eggshell?
  White will do.
Very Good Sir!
  Ok, Do you think your.....
 It's just that... I don't like mentioning these things, but well...nipples.
   Say again?
 Nipples, Sir. They are showing in your painting.
   It's a man.
Still, Sir. Our clientele is of the utmost sensitive tastes.
  You're kidding, right?
 No, Sir. If you could just....?
   More paint swatches on the painting?
 Brilliant, Sir! Yes!
   Sighs, ok. That's three cardboard swatches. Now....
 I should mention, Sir that we've had people complain about ummm (sshhh) Fingers.
   Fingers?

 You see, Sir. Some of our clientele have mentioned that some people ..umm..do sexual things with their fingers, so they think it only wise to not show fingers in a painting.

   Fingers huh? I'll be damned.
Sir, If you could refrain from cursing...
   Of course, yes. I'll just put these swatches here and here.
 And Sir if it wouldn't be too much trouble, the mouth?
    Don't even say it! I'm covering it now! Are these people medicated?
 Our clientele, Dear Sir is always right.
    Yeah, I should probably calm down. I mean I do want to show my work, after all.
Precisely, Sir.
    So, Now, the genitalia, fingers, nipples and mouth are covered. Do you think...
 I don't mean to nit-pic, Sir, but there is an awful lot of skin showing.
.  It's a NUDE!
Sir, This is a dignified establishment! Keep your voice down.
   Sighs, so.......swatches?
 If you don't mind, Sir.
   Do have another box of them?
 Right here, Sir.

   Thank you.

 As always, of course. We tend to our artists, Sir.
   Ok Fine. Everything is covered but the hair.
 Sir?
   FINE, The HAIR is covered too. It's nothing but a white canvas.
 Ah, now THIS is art! Expressive, original ...but
   WHAT?
 The title, Sir. "Nude on Canvas?"
   What about it?!
 It's the word Nude, Sir. Our clientele find it to be overtly suggestive.
   Sighs, "ON CANVAS?!!!" How's that?!!!!
 It raises an eyebrow, Sir. The word "ON" is obviously perverse.
   WHAT THE?!
 Sir, Please don't make me sing "Let's get it *ON" by Marvin Gaye. What do you think he meant by "ON?"

   You're a nutcase, you know.

 Sir, It's only for our clients and in your best interest.
   So, "Canvas?!"


"Nude 7"
11x14
Acrylic on Canvas



Passion

"Nude 10"
11x14 Acrylic on Canvas



Passion

“Hot” he says so innocently without notion.                            

Careful where you stand. Guard the seething cauldron.

Flames lick, and stretch, caressing in soothing stings

“Feels good” he says warming by embers that softly sing

With ferocity temporarily tame kinetic tombs.

“I love you” he says. Don’t let it consume

Unless you want it, Lest your tempted to open the gate,

Be forwarned. You tread the territory of fate.

Then there’s no return to cavernous space.

 Watch your heart and guard your face,

Yet I can tell you, it will not harm in it’s throes                     

It protects, feeds on its own and grows,

And you are the flames as much as I.

Dive if you’re brave. I rise dripping, meet heart to eye.

Flames lick wet whips in unquenchable screams.

Tongues in heat froth erotic creams.

Breath burns on skin, sweet acidic warm

Touches dissolve towers built from harm.

And walls fall like so much silk

In a gentle kiss, one another’s milk

Be us both lost or found by the liquid sun in me

Who only asks for all, whose All is all of me.

All of me, and all of you melted, to one that began two.

Unchain, reveal me. I beg, unleash me to you.

I am more than a storm of raining fire

I am more than me, reborn of simple desire.

A third is made, an Us created that is more powerful

Than any singular beginning or awakening hour, full

And mercilessly loving. The monster gloriously untethered

 Viciously entangled and ferociously surrendered.

I don’t know that I can survive this, and I cannot find a spark of care.

Stay with me close, Let me become this. Come with me trembling there.

Let me be more than what you see

And only who I am when I am free.

Sweet insanity, this longing without mistake,

No cold threatens, no isolation and no ache.

Arms hurt for now to hold. Sweet kindness cools and soothes

Through bitter nails and hungry bites with will-weakening  moves.

Sweet hunger starved for satiation,

Primal mind, writhing contemplation

Of single kisses and madly thrashing waves

Of willing partners, each others drenched slaves

It wakes, and cries, walls torn apart,

Dare you look, the cost... is but your heart,

For this passion no eyes yet see,

The win is love, and the prize is me.

Still I understand eyes that in fear cannot bear, .

I’ve seen the hidden places that souls cannot share,

I know fear, and I have compassion

For existence long since in silenced passion.

 I know the heat within, and I know the door.

I know how to close it, and I know that I want more.

The sadness of it is, I know how much I have to share

and crux remains, How much can you bear

Of love?

Tina Jones

Self Love in Death's Arms

  About six or eight years ago, I attended a life drawing studio. The model was thin, and thin isn't what I would normally view as beautiful, but she was graceful and delicate with a few curves of feminity and a great mane of dark hair. I got out one of the sketches I'd done of her, and I'd left out a lot, so a painting was going to take further construction. I began working shadows and lights, and found myself remembering.
 I got very thin last year, certainly not so much as this painting, but it was bad. I had cancer. It was anal squamous cell carcinoma. I'm ok now, infact a little overweight, but I remember the "me" of the time with much tenderness. Months spent in lieing there in pain that medicine couldn't touch, often losing conciousness at the pain, unable to move, and unable to eat. My daily goal was to drink a little water. In exhausted moments, and there were some where there was less pain, daydreaming of painting the memorized ceiling, and meditating to hold on to a degree of sanity, and the quiet that comes with surrender...the acceptance of the respit of death. The "it's going to be ok," I'll rest soon, and the watching of faces of loved ones, whom I didn't want to leave, but "knew" I would, the deepest love for them and compassion at their suffering, they were so beautiful. I had lived a wonderful life afterall, and I was grateful.... In retrospect, there was even a beauty in the fragile state of such horrid illness. Looking at the painting, is at once frightening and heart-rendering. I have the feeling of wanting to pick her up and tell her she'll be ok, that's it ok to let go, and that I love her.
   I underwent a major surgery, and did it really for the love of my family, so they'd know I cared enough for them to try, but I didn't expect it to work. I had nothing left to fight with. Months went by, and so slowly I was able to eat again, move without pain and far beyond my understanding, I'm alive.
   I had seen people die before, and I had attended their needs and comfort. I have held hands and cried with them, and I've seen the peace that comes before they go. I thought I was strong, but I had never been the one who was dieing, the one who went so far into and beyond pain to absolute serenity.
   This is not the first time I've seen the light at the end of the tunnel, and sure as death must come for all of us one day, it won't be my last. Until then, serenity remains, love abounds and I paint.
tina jones



"Emaciated Nude"
11x14"
Acrylic on Canvas



"Iris" Transformation of a Painting (nude)

It was an ok painting that did of some "Irises" years ago, hence the title.  At the time, there were a few television artists showing how to paint blended strokes. Usually, this is done by double loading a flat brush. One corner is dipped into one color of paint, and the other corner is dipped in another color. The brush is taken to the palette, and brushed back and forth until it leaves a mark transitioning smoothly from one color to the next. The brush is then taken to canvas to make the same kind of mark.

 

Inspired by a photograph of a model I took a handful of years back, and the interest in Van Gogh's "Irises" paintings, and the love of skeletal and muscle structure,  I set out to recreate what I'd created. I was fascinated by the foreground leg, so that's where I began.

 The original completely covered, I began sculpting the form. I added a bench for her to sit on. To remain true to my original painting and the idea of Irises, I put scumbles loosely in the back ground, and tightened up some forms to resemble the flower vaguely. A sheer drapery was added over the bench to reflect the flower petal's shape in hopes that the figure would become part of the flower. The thought led me to look up paintings by Georgia O'keefe for inspiration.

With the form set solidly, I began focus on light and shadow then added color. This is Yellow Ocre over Ivory Black and Titanium White. In the end, more white and black were added to enhance tonality and shift small muscles and bone within the form to make it come forward or recede, reach to light or fade to darkness. The sheer drapery was trimmed leaving only the remaining petal shapes on the bench. These were highlighted and shaded as well, becoming a carving there.

Though there are many Irises in the final work, I felt the focus should be only one.... her, the timeless lady iris, who sits, supple stone in remembrance of a simple work done long ago.

"Iris"

24x30"

Acrylic on Canvas

Is she finished? I don't know. Perhaps she will call again one day. smiles

tina jones

P.S. Read Critique Comments on this work at About.com Painting: http://tinyurl.com/49yb6s5

5/25/2011: "Iris" Has now been featured in Psychology Today magazine!
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/aspergirls/201105/aspergers-bullying-and-self-advocacy